Perfecting the art of the living contradiction.

Monday, January 27, 2020

That it is possible


I’ve been (obsessively) reading Shakespeare’s tragedies recently, and I realized that one thing I love about Shakespeare is his ability to portray his heroes as deeply flawed and performing the foulest deeds, yet, at the same time, in such a way that as I follow their story, I find myself seeing past their misdeeds and loving, or at the very least, understanding them.

Hamlet’s indecisiveness; Lear’s foolishness and arrogance; Macbeth’s greediness and lust for power; these are major downfalls for these characters, with serious consequences for them and those around them. Yet, as we follow their stories, we come to understand why they are the way they are; we come to see their inner demons, as well as their inner goodness, and we come to understand how both driving forces combine, and how they often result in tragic consequences.

In Lear’s case, for example, his love for his youngest daughter, is a major driving force during the play; yet, in his misguidedness, Lear expresses this love in such a way that it destroys him, his daughter, and others around them. Hamlet is driven by the noble impulse of obtaining justice for his father’s murder and exposing his uncle’s crime, yet in his indecision and inability to translate thought into action, he precipitates tragic events around him. Macbeth behaves nobly at the beginning of the play, but when it is prophesied that he will be king, he recognizes the seeds of greed and lust for power growing in his heart, yet he is unable to do anything to overcome these impulses, and becomes a raging tyrant and murderer.

And yet, despite horrendous acts throughout these plays, we are struck with the realization of their characters humaneness. We root for them, knowing that they can do better, seeing the possibility of redemption and the seeds of goodness in their heart, even as we condemn their vile, misguided actions.

This realization is something that we can translate to our daily lives right now. Though for most of us our everyday lives are (thankfully) less dramatic and violent than Shakespeare's plays, the fact remains that we judge ourselves and those around us based on limited aspects of our personalities, and the manifestations of those aspects. We judge and categorize each other based on our misguided deeds, and on perceived, though real, character flaws. In contrast to this, Shakespeare reminds us that to understand a person in their totality, to recognize their positive driving forces, as well as and their misguided deeds, is to come to love them. And, I would add, that to understand and forgive each other this way, lays the ground for positive transformation to occur.

Shakespeare does not tell us that everything will work out fine in the end. Because, clearly, it doesn’t. What Shakespeare does help us realize though, is that everyone is worthy of understanding and forgiveness, that we are all indeed lovable, and that at any moment, redemption is possible.

Peace


Saturday, January 25, 2020

...no more

"Seek to know no more". (Macbeth 4.1.118)


I am purposely taking this great quote out of context and applying it in a way that moves me at this point in my life.


Seeking to know more is human; it's fun and it can encourage growth and development. But as with everything, there is a limit, and there are times when being with a situation as is, is wiser than seeking to know more. 


Knowing, seeking, questioning must be balanced by being, otherwise we risk not being fully present in our lives.


I find this particularly applicable to when we're faced with difficult life circumstances. Our first impulse is to seek to know why things are happening to us. We want someone or something to blame, even if it's just ourselves. This approach may yield insight and understanding, and maybe some ways to prevent future distress. Yet, pushed past a certain point, it becomes self defeating.


After a amount of questioning, it's no longer helpful to keep asking why. Rather, it is more beneficial to be with whatever is happening, to feel it and own it, and have faith and patience, trusting that a way forward will reveal itself from there.




Friday, January 24, 2020

To " make good of bad, and friends of foes”


“God’s benison go with you, and with those
That would make good of bad, and friends of foes.”
(Macbeth 2.4.40-41)

So says the Old Man in Macbeth, thus encapsulating what I believe is our main purpose in life. When we lose our way and wonder why we’re here, I think these lines provide a very accessible answer: to “make good of bad, and friends of foes”.

No matter who we are, or where we are; no matter how old or young we are; regardless of our life circumstances; one thing we may be sure of is that life will present us with problems in many forms. These problems are our challenge, and they're never fun or to be wished for. Yet, they alone present our greatest opportunity, and provide the raw material for growth and transformation.

Figuring out how to work with difficulties in such a way as to “make good of bad, and friends of foes”, lays the foundation for transforming ourselves and the world around us. This is a lifetime of work, yet to me, there's nothing more powerful or meaningful than this.

So, if you’re finding yourself in a particularly difficult spot in your life right now, take heart and know that you’re not alone, and may the old man’s blessing follow you on the path ahead.

(This picture is from Shakespeare Garden in Central Park, which I visited last week. It's a beautiful spot and I do hope to return when the flowers are blooming).

Peace

Wednesday, January 22, 2020

Happy Birthday to my mom!

I put together this little collage for her, with things she likes around the farm. I hope that it will warm her and make her smile.

https://youtu.be/qaf-Wu_bH04

Peace

Tuesday, January 21, 2020

Power



In this quote from King Lear, Shakespeare makes us distinguish between two kinds of power: the kind of power which stands in its own right, through its own virtue; versus that which can only stand because it is borne, or allowed to continue by those who are made to suffer by it.


I see this quote as being applicable in a wide range of contexts, from socio-cultural, to political and economic; but here, I want to bring it down to the personal level. 


I am lucky enough to know a few people who I would call truly powerful in the positive sense of the word. What makes them so is their humility and personal integrity, their lived experience, their love, empathy and compassion, and their ability to stay open and sensitive despite difficulties. 


On the other hand, I've also been in situations, and have seen others close to me in situations where they felt oppressed by someone who held power over them; the kind of power that draws its strength not from the person who wields it, but from the victims who allow it to continue to manifest.


People in the first category of power enable and empower others to become their best; while people in the second are enabled by others, mainly those they oppress.


I love how Shakespeare brings these distinctions into focus, allowing us to look at relationships with more awareness and understanding. Of course, most relationships don't fit neatly into one category or the other, but combine elements of both. Still, I find it useful to think about things in this light, and I hope you do too. 


I will leave you with this one question I have been asking myself since reading Shakespeare's lines: what kind of power dynamics am I a part of (at different levels), and which do I want to continue to enable?


Peace

Saturday, January 18, 2020

NYC: pics from Friday


NY Public Library



Bow Bridge, Central Park



Sena, after she was done with the photo shoot at Marie Claire. She will be featured in the April issue.

Peace 

Shakespeare garden, Central Park

Whatever life presents us with, may we retain our capacity to be astonished and moved by the beauty around us. Whatever else we may suffer, if we can do this, our hearts will remain whole. 





More about our day trip to NYC to come.

And, I did very well on my Physics test. Thank you for rooting for me!


Peace 

Wednesday, January 15, 2020

Praxis II and Marie Claire!

The next couple of days will be stressful but exciting! Tomorrow is my Praxis II physics test, which, if I pass, will be one major step to allow me to get certified to become a physics teacher. I've been reviewing my stuff, and I'm feeling pretty good about it, but the stressful part is the timing. There are 125 questions and 1.2 minutes per question. Two and a half hour for the whole test, so you have to go fast. My approach to math and physics has never been to memorize. I like to understand and derive my equations from first principles, but in this test, there's no time for that; you have to slam down the equations fast, one after the other, and not think too much, otherwise you won't finish. So I've been memorizing. I'm looking forward to tomorrow night. Tomorrow, I'm going to work as usual, and then hopefully take a 30 min nap or meditate to clear my mind, and then the test is at 5pm.

Then, on Friday, Sena and I are going to NYC. She has been contacted by the fashion magazine Marie Claire and invited down for a photo shoot! They are doing a story on young women activists, and Sena is one of three (I think) young women they are profiling. She is super excited, and I am super excited! They will be providing outfits, shoes, and probably stylists, and that's about all we know, but it sounds like a lot of fun. While she's at the photo shoot, which will be about 5 hours, I plan to go walk in central Park and maybe check out some cafes / bookstores in the area. It will be a nice reward after the stress associated with the exam.



So that's what's going on. Now, I'm going back to my equations.
Peace


Friday, January 10, 2020

Philippe de Champaigne - A great reminder: Our time is short

In this painting by Philippe de Champaigne, our life is represented by the tulip, and its fleeting nature by the hourglass. Death is central to the image. Though in our culture, speaking about death is taboo, death has always been the great reminder, giving us a way to put things in perspective.



What comes to my mind when I look at this paining is fragility, transience, beauty; also, the lack of significance, in an absolute sense, of any and everything, and yet, in a relative sense, the incredible importance of each and every ordinary moment of our lives.

This painting motivates me to get over whatever holds me back, do my best to appreciate life as is, and contribute what I can towards creating goodness and beauty in the world.

I hope you enjoy it.

Peace

Sunday, January 05, 2020

Farmy videos from December

I've been busy studying for my upcoming Physics teacher certification exam, so I haven't had much time for posting, but I do want to share a couple of short videos, about 1 min each, from this past December, featuring some of our animals. I hope you enjoy them.

The cows and horse:
https://youtu.be/cD_gGYgGWfM
The ducklings, and a chicken:
https://youtu.be/bUlZXvFZfVc

Peace

Wednesday, January 01, 2020

Happy New Year!

Skating in Hartford on New Year's Eve

Fireworks at midnight

And our yearly family photo from Christmas in Montreal
Peace

Thursday, December 26, 2019

Christmas in Montreal

Sena and Aiyana 

Sena and Aiyana with their cousins: Julia, Stella and Lucy
My mom with her granddaughters.


Peace 

Monday, December 23, 2019

Happy Birthday Sena!!!

Today is a very special day. It's Sena's 16th birthday! I can't believe it.

Sena is an amazing person, and she's been getting lots of recognition recently as you may know, from different news media, public officials, etc. Yet, all of that doesn't even come close to describing the beautiful person that she truly is.

Although I could write pages on Sena's qualities and accomplishments, instead, I want to briefly describe the impact she has had on me. Sena has given me more than I ever thought possible: understanding, purpose, hope and courage! Because of her, I've been able to stand up for things that I've been too weak to address before. Her example and the kind of person she is give me strength and inspire me to believe in myself and keep moving forward when things are tough. Because of her, I've learnt not only how to stand up for a cause I believe in (for example, my work with pollinators), but how to stand up for myself! I never expected to receive this gift from my child. She allowed me to find a power inside me that I didn't know I had.

And now, just for memory's sake, I want to list some favorite times with Sena over the past year:
Some of my favorite times together are definitely the conversations we have when it's just the two of us. Her maturity level and depth are beyond that of most adults I talk with, and our conversations often leave me with much insight and food for thought. I also love listening to music together when we're driving in the car. I love getting books out for her from the library, and then having her tell me which ones she liked and which she didn't, and why. I love talking about what it means to be a woman in this world. I love talking to her about Shakespeare or other books I'm reading, and, even though she doesn't want to read them herself, I love that she listens to me and I can talk about the lines or ideas I find interesting and get thoughtful feedback from her. I love that she lets me be myself, and never makes me feel ashamed of who I am, even when I do silly or irresponsible things that I know she wouldn't do herself.

There's just so much I want to say, but I don't want to ramble. I am just so grateful!

Here are some pictures of Sena taken over the past year:

In the Dominican Republic
At the September 20th climate rally
In front of the Capitol Building at the November 6th rally, with Sunrise co-director, Mitch.
With Ed at the Fox interview a few weeks ago
 Another interview last week
 At UConn (after finishing her first semester with a 3.94 GPA)

Happiest Birthday, Sena, and thank you for being such an amazing force and person!

Peace

Saturday, December 21, 2019

Happy winter solstice!

May this time of year bring you comfort and clarity.

Peace 

Thursday, December 19, 2019

All I need to know

What is amazing to me is that among the misguidedness and wretchedness of the world, among the manipulation, fear, shame, betrayal -
love remains; kindness remains; beauty and goodness remain. Not only remain, but thrive. This is all I need to know and my only basis for any kind of belief.



Peace 

Wednesday, December 18, 2019

Sheer loveliness

It is so lovely out there this morning, after the ice storm. It just lifts the heart and washes everything away. I am so grateful, and wish you all ease and fun and lightheartedness today!


Peace

Saturday, December 14, 2019

Some recent poems

To feel and let ourselves be moved: therein lies our connection.



I'm fascinated by fields: electric fields, magnetic fields, gravitational fields. Sometimes I like to think of love as a field as well: how we can sense its energy even when we don't know its source; how it moves us to act and how it results in practical manifestations even as we debate what it is. 



How 



Peace 

Thursday, December 12, 2019

Two things

I've got two things I'm really excited about:

One, I finished reading Hamlet. Wow! I can't believe I haven't read it until now. Almost every verse is incredible. I'm getting quite friendly with the librarian at our school and she's hooking me up with all kind of great sources analyzing Shakespeare. I've got 3 different books out on Hamlet now.

Two, I think I decided that I want to get certified to teach high school physics and possibly math. I will have to pass a physics exam and then take classes to get my education certificate. Should be done by 2021. I can do all this part time while still working in my current job assisting my current teachers.
I already started studying for my exam. It's pretty fun!

Peace 

Monday, December 09, 2019

Sena's Fox61 interview

You can watch it here:
https://fox61.com/2019/12/08/the-real-story-environmental-activist-sena-wazer/

Saturday, December 07, 2019

Thug Notes on Hamlet

Not your trypical literary analysis, but I love Thug Notes. Here's their take on Hamlet (which I'm currenly reading):
https://youtu.be/A98tf9krihg