This evening I felt tired and heavy and my mind was
scattered, so even though I didn’t feel like it, I forced myself to go out and
take some whey to the compost pile. I thought I’d get something done and get a
little fresh air at the same time. It was dark out, and the air felt refreshing
right away. The night was damp and warm and as it enveloped me I felt a
release, as if I walked into a welcoming embrace.
I walked to the
compost pile and dumped the whey. I set my bucket down and walked further into
the night, away from the house. I found a spot in the field and lay down on the
earth, facing up to the sky. Immediately, I felt tension and fatigue leave my
body as if a weight was taken off me. I felt completely supported by the earth.
As I looked up to the sky, light drizzle fell on my face. I lay there and
listened to the wind speak a low rumble in distant trees. Occasionally, the few
remaining leaves on nearby trees moved with a soft rustle. Low to the ground as
I was, I could smell sweet grass and damp earth. It made me think about cows and how they love to sniff at the grass before they eat - that sweet earthy
smell...
I only lay like that a few minutes before going back to the
house, but it was enough to make me feel as if I had stepped in a different
world, a world outside my head, a world real and rich and alive. It
was enough to clear my mind and strengthen my body for a while, and give me a
deep sense of peace. It occurred to me that the expression “feeling grounded” was
more literal than I thought. I hope that next time I feel weak or down or too
much stuck in my head I will remember that doing something so simple as
stepping outside can help so much.
We all carry so much stuff: sickness, anguish, responsibilities
of all kinds, guilt, self-loathing, depression, exhaustion… We try all kinds of
things to make ourselves feel better, happier, to get some relief. Sometimes connecting
with our natural environment in a simple way is all we need to let go if only
for a short while. That physical connection with the earth and the natural
world may help us let go of the business of our lives and minds, all the
responsibilities we have and all the things that go wrong. It may stir the forgotten, dream-like
feeling that we are all part of something much larger, and we are not alone.
This connection doesn’t have to be anything fancy, we don’t
need to go on a special retreat, although that may have its benefits, or to
some far-away place, or to some special teacher. Sometimes just a patch of
grass in our back yard, a tree, a river, or simply listening to the wind in
solitude, and a willingness to let go is all it takes for a change to occur, or
a glimpse of hope.
Peace
