compost

i just came back from Blue Slope Farm, where i went to inspect compost piles. i want to order a truckload from them so i can have it ready in the spring as soon as we can start planting.
it was fun being there. Ernie, the man whose farm it is, is 80 some years old, and he took me around the farm in his truck to show me the compost piles. i'm glad i came prepared, dressed appropriately, bc it was really mucky, but at the same time kind of fun, riding in a big truck with this old man who called me miss... we checked out 3 compost piles, and the last one had a lot more earth worms in it than the other two, so that's the one i want. ernie makes his compost out of cow manure, horse manure, some chicken manure, as well as wood chips, leaves and hay. the piles all looked beautiful, very rich, dark earth. but i'm no expert on this. i need to learn more about compost and how to tell apart good from bad. i know earthworm activity is something you want lots of, but i still have lots to learn. i read somewhere that making compost is the most important thing on a farm, since good compost will bring health to the soil, and everything else will stem from there. i hope to be able to make our own compost one day, instead of bringing it in from the outside. that would be really cool, and then our farm would move towards being truly sustainable. i love the idea of being self sufficient, of recycling and reusing everything on the farm, so that nothing is wasted and there's no need for outside input. that's the ideal. anyway, we are thinking of getting sheep someday, which would help towards making our own compost, but we have enough on our plate right now, so that will have to wait a while....

i had a dream last night. i had moved back to montreal and i had to find a job. i was really upset by the idea of having to go to a job every day, and i could not think of anything i'd want to put that much time and energy in. but i knew i needed money. so i was very anxious. at the same time, i vaguely remembered doing something that i really enjoyed not long ago, but i couldn't remember what it was. all i remembered is that i used to be outside a lot, that i really liked it, and that whatever it was i was doing brought in enough money to live on. i was crying because i could not remember what it was, or how to get back to it.

i woke up and felt so relieved to be out of the dream. it also made me so happy to realize how much i'm really enjoying what i'm doing. i had a lot of doubts when i left engineering, and when i left the concept of a "job" behind. i had even more doubts when ed decided to do the same. it felt like such a huge leap to be out on our own, and there were so many people telling us we were crazy (and also so many encouraging us). but i am so glad to say that at least this far, it's been amazing, a great experience, and so much fun, and so hard at the same time, but in a different way than a "job" can be hard. it's been very positive from all aspects, i think, including financial. we took a loss this year, as expected when first starting a business. but next year, our expenses will be a lot lower (since the greatest part this year were one time investments), and even if we have the same income as this year (which is unlikely, since we planning to expand a lot, and hoping to maybe double the amount of money coming in), we should still come up with some net gain. we've had such encouraging feedback at our markets, and i can only see it getting better.

peace