my morning

this morning i had my weekly 2 hrs to myself. i walked out the door with sena screaming for me not to go. that was really hard. i can't bear to leave her like that. but staying and talking to her only prolongs it and makes it harder for everyone. and ed tells me that by the time i'm out of the driveway she's stopped crying anyway. so i guess this is the way to do it...

so i left the house somewhat shaken, and decided to go to the woods to get a little grounded. i went to one of my favorite spots, an out-of-the-way path by the river. there's nobody ever there, so i feel like it's my own secret spot.

i got there, parked the car, and took off my shoes. walking the path and feeling the cool earth under my feet already made me feel calmer. i didn't walk too far, just enough to be out of sight of the dirt road i had come from. the path is narrow and hugs the Fenton river as it twists through the woods. before long, i found a beautiful spot, where the sun was breaking through the trees. i stopped and sat down feeling myself warm up. my eyes had to adjust to the brightness reflecting off the river. all i heard around me were singing birds, the wind, and the river.

immersed in these surroundings, i felt myself calm down; i felt tension and hardness dissolve. slowly, i forgot about everything, and i felt my face relax into a slight smile. i felt protected and nourished.

i was only there for 15 min but it was enough for me to feel inspired to go on with the rest of my day, to welcome it, whatever it may look like. i gave a little thanks, walked back to where i had left my shoes, and drove to starbucks for a coffee, some breakfast, and some reading.

i came home after my 2 hrs feeling amazing. ed and the kids were not there yet (still at the park). i put on some music, and started dancing. had to express the energy i felt somehow...
i danced a couple of songs, took a shower, and then started cooking for a party we're going to this afternoon.

i'm at my sister's house right now, with my parents who drove from montreal.

a great day so far, and i hope yours is too

peace