money is time

time is money, i heard. but money is time, this i know. at this point i value the time more than the money.

i say this because i saw a friend recently that i hadn't seen in a while, and she, like many others seemed pretty surprised to hear that i am considering (very strongly) not returning to work. paid work, that is.

i explained to her that our lifestyle is very simple: we have inexpensive cars; are looking for a small and cheap house that we can hopefuly pay w/o getting in debt for the rest of our lives; i shop at the salvation army and the flea market; etc. so we can get by w/o needing to have a huge income. ed's salary provides more than enough at this point, and hopefuly in the near future he can cut down to a part-time work schedule and plant his trees the rest of the time.

there's no question that my time is more valuable than the extra money i could earn working. as long as we have enough cash to pay for moinimum necessities (this is subjective, i realize), and a little bit set aside just in case of emergency, we are happy.

our lives are going by, and i like to spend mine playing with sena and aiyana and all the other free spirits out there, rather than in the office. i like to spend my time watching the trees flower, the grass grow, and the clouds go by. you get the idea. oh, not to mention reading. or pursuing any interest i may be motivated to pursue. can extra cash make me want to give these things away? not at this point.

i realize how lucky i am to be in this position. lucky not to have to worry about my family's health, safety and other basic necessities. also lucky not to be driven by desire for so many things.

one day, i'm sure i'll work for money again. but hopefuly it won't be the major part of the day, and even more hopefuly it won't be for money primarily.

i never thought this way before i left work. i was too caught up in the daily routine, and i din't know what i was missing. i didn't know that it's fun to watch the grass grow. that i'd enjoy it so much. i used to think i'd go crazy with boredom being home with young children. you know, how about adult conversation? now i think it's the reverse. maybe they're bored with me. they're so much more intelligent, so much more spontaneous and free than i could ever be. bored? not quite. the only reason i've considered returning to work is, honestly, bc in some ways it would be so much easier than staying home taking care of them.

but anyway, these are just thoughts. and i hope they're not offensive to anyone. i know they make no sense.

but i hope that if anyone reads this, they do take the time to watch the trees, and the grass, and the birds, and the sky at least once in a while.

peace