Perfecting the art of the living contradiction.

Friday, January 25, 2013

sena, aiyana and i had a great time today. sena recorded some of it in these pics she took with her own camera (except for the ones of her, which i took; i also cropped a couple of hers):

they wanted to go to the cafe on sherbrooke where i first met larissa; after talking about it for a while, they were not disappointsd. we had croissants (chocolate for aiyana as you see) and coffee and a nice view of busy city streets

 i showed them some of the engineering buildings where i studied. this statue was nearby,
 for lunch we went to an indian restaurant and had more food than we could eat.
 sena loved the soup and naan
 she liked some of the decorations too
 and this is driving back home...


vermont is really beautiful. yesterday sena, aiayan and i had a great day driving from CT to Montreal. it was sunny and cold and the roads were not busy. i like VT because there are no billboards, and mostly because of the mountains. i am impressed and moved to be in the vicinity of mountains that are over 400 million years old, and which, even though they may not be impressive in size anymore, they're nevertheless impressive in age and what they've been through. i read that the Appalachians were once as high as the Rockies or Alps, and were formed at the time when Pangea, the supercontinent, was coming together. that is humbling, and i do feel awed and grateful to be in their presence.

through this long bout i've had with whooping cough over the past month, my mind kept returning over and over to the topic of midlife. i'm not sure what midlife is, but some of my friends are referring jokingly to their "midlife crisis". yesterday, on my drive up one thing became clear to me: that this age where i am right now has at least one great thing going for it - i am old enough to have some decent life experience, and young enough that if i want to make any changes and live my life differently i have time to do it (well, you never know about that of course, but i'm assuming...). so the question that has been coming back to me over the past weeks, is if and how do i want my life to be different? i'm having a hard time coming up with answers, because i am pretty content already. but some vague feelings do come up: i think i'd like to be more present with the children, less distracted. also, i know that i want to deepen my experience with and contact with the natural world. like the mountains i drove through yesterday. i've driven through them plenty of times before, and usually noticed them only superficially. either i have the radio on, or something else to distract me from the full experience. yesterday was different, but i know that i still have a ways to go before i experience them openly and fully. and it's like that with almost everything.

so about midlife, actually, when i think about the topic, i have a surge of hope and excitement, of unbounded possibility, and that feels really good. i feel more ready now to recognize what's important than i was earlier in my life, and thus i feel more able to take my life in a meaningful direction.all that being said, i have yet to articulate to myself any changes that i want to make, but i feel that if any, they will be more of a suddle, internal nature than external, and i expect that to take a long time.

Monday, January 21, 2013

Happy Birthday to my Mom!

Today is my mom's birthday, and I hope it's a good day for her, and that it brings her comfort and joy.
I hope to be able to come to Montreal later in the week and spend some time with my parents. It seems that our cough has finally gotten better, so if the weather cooperates, we'll be going. Sena and Aiyana are very excited about going to Montreal again and the three of us hanging out together in the city. They want to go to bookstores and cafes. They are great companions.

Thursday, January 17, 2013

fertility plan

i've been working on our farm's fertility plan for 2013. always fun to do that. lots of data to look at and figure out what action to take. we have now about 4-5 years worth of soil test data, so we can start looking at patterns across time and location. it's very interesting. overall, things are looking very good. a few minerals which are notoriously low in this area of the country still need amending (such as Boron, Sulfur, and some trace elements). major nutrients (Calcium, Phosphorus, Potassium) are mostly good levels or getting there, and our humus levels are great (7.5% and greater). overall i think that we have good microbial action in our soils, and we need only a few inputs (compost, rock powders, fish, seaweed) in order to keep up the fertility. i think the cover crops we've been incorporating over the past year have helped us a lot.

Tuesday, January 15, 2013

CSA info for 2013

finally today we published our farm's 2013 CSA information and sign-up form (see our farm website if interested). ed and i have been working on it for a while, making sure to get all the details are covered. lots of behind-the-scenes suff, and i feel relieved to finally have it done.

other thank that, i've been sick with whooping cough. sena and aiyana also had it. between the three of us, we've been sick since december 21. lots of coughing, painful and disruptive of sleep and normal activities. we've quarantined ourselves to our house so as not to get others sick. sena and aiyana are almost all better now, not contagious anymore, and i am coming along. being sick is not fun, but it certainly does make one appreciate good health all over again. fortunately throughout this i've been able to go out on walks and hikes, which is the only thing that would make me stop coughing. nights have been the hardest for me, with back-to-back coughing fits, especially when laying down.
i've been re-reading "into the wild", which i found in a box in the attick. a great book, if you haven't read it.

peace

Friday, January 11, 2013

a walk at sunset: Mansfield Hollow

as much as i've tried hard to learn from books and schools, not much that i hold of any significance, has been learned that way; instead, what matters most to me and what i live by, has slowly and sometimes painfully, been revealed through time, personal experience and contact with real teachers.


peace

Monday, January 07, 2013

hearing from an old friend

i checked the mailbox today at the beginning of my daily walk, and in it was a beautiful postcard from my "old" friend Larissa. it came as a complete surprise, since i lost all touch with her years ago, and it brought me to tears right there by the side of the road. i was so happy to hear from her, and it's funny because just recently i was thinking of her and our times together in montreal.

Larissa, if you read this blog, i just want to say thank you for thinking of me and for making my day.
i often tell Sena and Aiyana stories about when we were friends in Montreal, about how we met working at the cafe on Sherbrooke, and about our fun times in Boston and so on. they love the stories and i love telling and reliving them.

later in my walk, i put my hand in my pocket and fished out a rabbit tail i forgot in there a few weeks ago when i tanned a skin. this made me think of how much has changed since my "city slicker" days (Ed's expression; i think it's funny) when we were friends; but on a deeper level, of course, nothing much has changed. certain people, like you, will always be present in my life, regardless of external circumstances.

so thank you again, and truly, i wish you the best.

Thursday, January 03, 2013

Hapy New Year!

started the new year with a much needed visit to the ocean;
and some fun in the snow



the bees are snug in the snow-covered beehives
these are sena's very delicious raspberry muffins (with our own raspberries from last summer)
 our fields are now covered in snow, resting after a season's work
peace

Friday, December 28, 2012



It’s very pretty outside, white snow on the ground, clear sky, and sunny.
Sena, Aiyana and I were supposed to be in Montreal now, spending time with my family. But Aiyana got a bad cough, and I got sick from her too, and we had to cancel the trip. We’ve been sick and not sleeping well for about a week now, but today I’m feeling refreshed somehow. I always get a feeling of lightness and clarity after being sick. 

On Christmas Eve, our neighbors and two CSA customers/ friends stopped by our house, at separate times, to bring gifts and home-made cookies. We didn't expect it, and when they came, it showed us that people think and care about us, and it was all very sweet.

A young couple in who has been in our CSA since we started and who have become good friends had their first baby, a little boy, three weeks ago. The birth and everything went really well, and yesterday, when I spoke to them on the phone, they said that we had a "share" in how well things went, and how healthy they are. I am humbled, and so happy to hear that. Of course we hope that that's what our labor's result would be, but to hear it unexpectedly like that is very moving.

So good things have been happening, as they always do.

Looking ahead into the new year, I'm working on seed orders, CSA planning and all of the planning/daydreaming that we do at this time of year.

Here are some pictures from the past 2 weeks:

Sena and Aiyana checking themselves out before Granma comes to pick them up for the Yacht Club Christmas Party. Got to be fancy for that!
and here they are posing
 aiyana before she got sick
sena and aiyana
Long Tail is the smallest and fiercest of our 4 cats. she likes her space and none of the other cats mess with her. she is very friendly with us and likes to lie in cardboard boxes in the sun. she's a mother (two of her sons also live with us), and she and I understand each other very well. she's also a great hunter, and is probably responsible in great part eliminating the rodent problem in our fields this past year.
before the snow, i managed to get some bulbs in the ground. i feel like i need to have something growing. planting the bulbs felt like a very hopeful thing to do at this time of year. i like to think of them waiting in the ground for just the right time to come out.
 aiyana and ed playing a game
 blue sky and our tool shed
aiyana and ed getting flint corn off the cob. sena then grinds it and uses the flower to bake. she makes biscuits and corn bread almost daily.
our wood stove is always nice to sit by in the winter. sena and aiyana got the bricks you see from the ocean. the were made smooth by the water, and we use them to absorb heat and warm our beds at night.
the girls and i planted paperwhites for christmas and now they are blooming.
peace

Saturday, December 22, 2012

Happy Solstice



It’s winter solstice, longest night of the year. Time for rest and renewal.
Inherent in this darkness is rebirth and the return of the light. A beautiful time of the year, when I find myself drawing in, mourning and rejoicing, receiving healing and comfort, and starting anew.

There is much to mourn: just recently the terrible shooting in Connecticut; in general, our lack of genuine concern for each other, our disconnection from the Earth, and all her creatures. I mourn for how far we as a society have strayed from the things that matter: the simple joy of feeling part of nature and acting like it; the feeling that what we do and how we act is meaningful; awareness, honesty, humility, gratitude, kindness. Privately, I mourn my loss of faith and respect for humans, a loss which often turns to resentment; resentment for what we have done historically, the pain that we bring onto ourselves and others through ignorance, fear, disrespect and apathy. I mourn these things and deep within myself, I feel their darkness, which frightens me. But I believe that within this darkness lies the spark of hope. Nature shows us over and over again, that at the darkest point, that’s when the light starts returning. Knowing that, I will start again. I will believe again, try again, trust again. I will continue to work for the good. I will continue to love this place, our beautiful earth and home, and do my best to honor it, and translate this talk into action.

I pray for courage to live in a good way and to do what I know is right even when it’s not popular.
I pray for healing for all of us, for the many things we suffer, and I send my gratitude to the many courageous teachers that, through the everyday actions of their lives, have shown us how to live peacefully and meaningfully, with dignity and respect.

Happy Solstice!

Friday, December 07, 2012

ed told me that i should add one more skill to my resume: "ditch digger". because what's what we did today (well mostly him, but i helped). we dug a 5ft deep drainage ditch for our new rootcellar, put down a pipe at the bottom, and covered with stones and soil. ed said that my parents would be proud of me. i don't know about that. he also quoted his grandmother, who is now dead: "from engineer to farmer. that's great, just GREAT!". she wasn't happy with the change, and was not afraid to let us know.
but i don't think that digging ditches in the cold rain is so bad. i learned something new, and i think i will put it on my resume. i think it's going to look cool. not that i'm looking for a job or plan to ever again. but you never know.

Monday, December 03, 2012

last sale of 2012, at the farm

check out our farm's December newsletter and 2012 CSA survey results if you're interested.

last thursday we held the last sale of the year at our farm. the vegetables looked really nice, and i couldn't help myself with the pictures.



peace

Tuesday, November 27, 2012

Monday, November 26, 2012

my thanksgiving

this weekend we had a thanksgiving ceremony at our farm. just our family and our good friends who helped us make the ceremony. i really wanted to do something a little bit formal to express the gratitude and love i feel in my heart towards our land, our animals, and our family. so we did it, and it was very simple but beautiful.

Wednesday, November 21, 2012

in november

i love these days. i can still work outside, but i don't need to be in a rush and there's no pressure like during the busy season. i can take my time harvesting or doing whatever needs to be done, and enjoy being outside.

this was a great season for us, in many ways. i am grateful for all of it.

here are some recent pictures:
snowman, happy children and home-grown carrot, a couple of weeks ago
i really like this picture of sena
very proud of our brussel sprouts. 3 ft long stalks and very tasty sprouts...
we grew our own flint corn this year. we bought a grinder, and the girls have been grinding it to make corn bread and other good things.

 another sunset over the farm

Thursday, November 15, 2012

sunset over the field, two days ago

this is the place where i live, work, rest, pray; my home, my sanctuary; the place that feeds and sustains us. i feel truly privileged.

Tuesday, November 13, 2012

Pickling, fermenting, root cellaring, and so on.




There are many ways to preserve food; the ones we use most are root cellar, freezing, canning and fermenting. Freezing is my least favorite, because it uses lots of energy and is vulnerable to power outages, which we now get on a yearly basis. I was a little nervous when we lost power with the storm a few weeks ago, since my freezer is full of food that we worked hard for, and I did not want to lose it. In future years I’d like to cut way back on freezing, and use other methods of preserving instead. Canning uses a lot of energy too, so I’m not crazy about it from that standpoint, but at least once canned, the food can safely be put on a shelf in the kitchen to last through the winter and more. Fermenting I love, and so far it’s my favorite way of preserving food. All you need is salt and water and good veges. It’s low impact as far as energy consumption, and as far as I know you can preserve many kinds of veges by fermenting them. I love the taste of fermented foods, and the health benefits (very good for our intestinal flora); unfortunately, Ed does not like fermented foods, and the kids like some but not others, so that’s a limitation. But I am planning to learn more about different ways of fermentation, and ways of incorporating fermented foods into cooked dishes, and maybe they’ll like it more.
So far this season, I’ve made sauerkraut (fermented green and red cabbage), fermented cauliflower and carrot pickles (Romanian style), pickled Lebanese turnip and pickled beets. These last two were not fermented, just refrigerated in vinegar brine.  Aiyana wants me to make kimchee, which she liked last year, and I want to try German fermented turnips, which I heard good things about. The Lebanese pickled turnips were my first this year, and they came out really good. I love eating them with venison steak, and they’re great with falafael (which is how I learned about them in the first place. You know those pink pickles you get when you go our for falafael? I always thought they were beets, but they’re mostly turnip with a little beet added for color).
It’s really nice to have had a change of pace with the end of the CSA. We’ve spent more time focused on the kids, especially homeschooling. Ed’s working with them every morning, and they have a schedule for each day. It’s all very organized, Ed style. I homeschool once in a while, when Ed’s busy doing something outside. Yesterday for example, he was working on moving the shed near our house, so I took over with the kids. He’s relocating the shed a short distance away. It will give us a nicer view of the fields from the house, but more importantly it will allow us to build a new root cellar where we hope to be able to store more veges. Root cellars are great for storage, as long as you can maintain the right temperature. This one will have 3 walls and the ceiling covered in earth, so hopefully it will naturally maintain a temp in the 40’s in there throughout the winter. That would work for storing root veges, such as carrots, beets, turnips, and other veges like cabbages and brussel sprouts.
As of right now, we still have a few veges in the field, such as lettuces, spinach and other greens, carrots, beets, turnips, brussel sprouts, etc. We plan to sell them through weekly farm sales over the next few weeks. Once they’re out of the ground, we plan to let the ground freeze everywhere, which means no winter production at all, at least for a couple of months. We think that this will be good for the soil, as well as for reducing disease and insect populations that may overwinter when the soil is not completely frozen (like when you have a hoop tunnel). We’ll see how this pans out over the next few years, but it feels good to be able to give the fields and ourselves a break from production.
I recently read a quote from an old-time farmer in The American Farm, by Maisie and Richard Courat. It reflects how I feel, and goes like this:
“The real products of any year’s work are the farmer’s mind and the cropland itself…The finest growth that farmland can produce is a careful farmer.”
Yes, the land teaches the farmer a lot if one is open, sensitive and willing to learn. One of the many beautiful things it teaches us is how to nurture and work in harmony for long-term wellbeing. As we learn these things, the health of the land and the crops it produces becomes a visible mark of our efforts. The health of the land has to come first if we are thinking long-term; focusing on crops alone can lead to misuse and abuse of the land, which will soon enough, and fairly enough, stop producing.